Putting God's Word into Practice…

I Feel So Alive!

on February 7, 2014

God is amazing!  He is patient, He is forgiving, He is love!  He is a seeking God–constantly pursuing us!  He longs to capture our hearts with His greatness and grace, but we push Him away–at least I have been.

During the month of January, I was unable to attend church because of having a newborn and living in the “polar vortex” area.  God used this time to strip back all the layers I had built up over months, maybe years, of doing full-time ministry.  He wrapped me in His love–reminding me afresh that first and foremost I am His–before being a wife, mother, pastor’s wife, blogger, women’s ministry leader, school teacher, etc…I am His daughter!  Nothing matters except resting in His grace and love and seeking daily His purpose for my life.

This past Wednesday, our women’s Bible study started watching the True Woman 2012 conference videos.  We started off with a message by Nancy Leigh DeMoss entitled, Seeking Him Together for Spiritual Awakening.  Although I was at the conference 17 months ago, and that message impacted by heart, I think it was more impacting this time.  Last time it led me to gratefulness that God never stops seeking me, this time it led me to brokenness that I so quickly give up on seeking Him.

There were several points of conviction.  One is that we are to seek the Lord intentionally. This means to clear out all distractions and CHOOSE to spend time with Jesus.  According to Jesus this is the only thing that is necessary! (1 Chronicles 22:19, Luke 10:42)  Seek Him first and everything will fall into place (Matthew 6:33).  Sometimes I get so busy serving the Lord that I am kept from seeking Him!  I think I’m seeking Him by reading my Bible every day but seeking is a matter of the heart, not a habit!

Link to message:  http://www.truewoman.com/?id=2204

Then yesterday I listened to a message also by Nancy Leigh DeMoss about pride and humility.  She offered a checklist to examine our lives for pride.  Ouch…how can I be so prideful and not even realize it!  Full disclosure: I was so convicted that I tuned out the last 10 minutes because I couldn’t take any more proofs of my pride.

Last night I heard a great message by Crawford Loritts at Moody Founder’s Week on 1 John 1:5-10, which I have just recently studied in my personal Bible reading.  Basically he talked about our response to seeing the holiness of God.  This morning as I spent time in prayer, and started responding to some discussion questions about the True Woman message for our meeting next week.  I was again overcome with conviction, and God used Pastor Loritts’ teaching last night to lead me to true repentance by confessing my sins and turning my life to walk in the Light of Christ.

At the risk of being completely vulnerable, I would like to share the conviction that led to repentance, and to freedom and joy. 1 Chronicles 16:11 says, “Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His presence continually!”

The question was posed, “How can you seek the Lord continually?”  My answer: In every circumstance, every decision, before I even start my day–humbly acknowledge that I need His direction.  (Proverbs 3:5-6)  Then it hit me like a flood–I rarely acknowledge Him.  I jump into “my” days–end up frazzled, impatient, rude, unloving, prideful, and selfish.  I waste the days He has given me by pursuing my own plans instead of seeking His, and I hurt others in the process.  God has planned every one of my days before any came to be (Psalm 139:16).  God saved me to walk in the plans He created for me (Ephesians 2:10).  Each day belongs to God and is His gift to me (Psalm 118:24).  How prideful to think otherwise!

I have wasted so many days, following my own desires and plans.  But God is a redeeming God!  And a reviving God!  In this moment I am surrendered to His will, and it feels so good! I feel so alive!  If you do nothing else today, spend some time really seeking the Lord.  He promises that He will be found by those who seek Him! (Deuteronomy 4:29, Jeremiah 29:13)


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